Well I am taking today as my last day of the glycerin department. I can continue till Friday, but I have no reason to, and I really don’t want to. I am not positive on the reasons why they decided lay me off so quickly, but I have some ideas. Luckily I pull out my contacts and found another position for next week. Its good to have contacts, and well it shows that I did good enough work in the first place! I also have my big interview coming up, and i am really nervous!
this interview sorta decides if were going to stay in cinn or move to cloumbus next year....
for family reasons and (most of all our friends live here to) we have stayed, but i need something more stable then scrapping for jobs.
Wednesday, August 29
Monday, August 27
Fast food Woes
FAST FOOD WOES
I lost a bet to my husband and had to pick up his lunch. He had a craving for a big mac. I had to shut my mouth and drive through to pick it up. I don’t know what possessed me to see if their ‘healthy’ salads could be made with out the chicken, but I asked, and, I could have it my way. (Yes I am using a crappy slogan) I thought I couldn’t get sick from a salad. I was wrong. I think they use beef seasoning on the lettuce, or the carrots were actually chicken. I haven’t felt good since I had my lovely salad.
For those who don’t know I’ve been without meat products for close to 13 years now. I use to be anal about it. Like asking about every ingredient, making sure they didn’t put chicken stock in the soup. Well after 13 years I am not so anal about how my veggies are grilled. It takes a lot of effort. I just use tactics of avoidance, like I rarely eat fast food. I know when shopping that Campbell’s, take and go Broccoli soup is made from chicken stock, but there regular soup isn’t. That Rice or Roni, usually has chicken somewhere in the box, and that I should never eat at O’Charleys because there isn’t anything I can eat.
I have long given up my fight against kfc, taco bell, and pizza hut. And after my four year boycott of buying food from McDonalds, I promise myself not to break it again. When I was pregnant I had cravings for taco bell. The results were rarely good, since I was prone to not holding down my cookies.
People were amazed I didn’t pick up my meat stick while I was pregnant. But my meat stick isn’t a part of me. I know that I am one woman standing alone against the practices of corporate America. As a working mother, I know that there isn’t always enough time in the day to cook a meal. That we are ingrained in this working culture-
I no longer lecture, because well I am not perfect. I simply can not afford to buy all my food organic. But most of Ezra’s food has an organic sticker. I wish organic milk was a lot cheeper, because soy isn’t always the greatest option. (it’s a lot harder for your body to digest.)
I know I am not a perfect, especially environmentally. I use disposable diapers. We are renters and don’t own our own washer. But I try-
I lost a bet to my husband and had to pick up his lunch. He had a craving for a big mac. I had to shut my mouth and drive through to pick it up. I don’t know what possessed me to see if their ‘healthy’ salads could be made with out the chicken, but I asked, and, I could have it my way. (Yes I am using a crappy slogan) I thought I couldn’t get sick from a salad. I was wrong. I think they use beef seasoning on the lettuce, or the carrots were actually chicken. I haven’t felt good since I had my lovely salad.
For those who don’t know I’ve been without meat products for close to 13 years now. I use to be anal about it. Like asking about every ingredient, making sure they didn’t put chicken stock in the soup. Well after 13 years I am not so anal about how my veggies are grilled. It takes a lot of effort. I just use tactics of avoidance, like I rarely eat fast food. I know when shopping that Campbell’s, take and go Broccoli soup is made from chicken stock, but there regular soup isn’t. That Rice or Roni, usually has chicken somewhere in the box, and that I should never eat at O’Charleys because there isn’t anything I can eat.
I have long given up my fight against kfc, taco bell, and pizza hut. And after my four year boycott of buying food from McDonalds, I promise myself not to break it again. When I was pregnant I had cravings for taco bell. The results were rarely good, since I was prone to not holding down my cookies.
People were amazed I didn’t pick up my meat stick while I was pregnant. But my meat stick isn’t a part of me. I know that I am one woman standing alone against the practices of corporate America. As a working mother, I know that there isn’t always enough time in the day to cook a meal. That we are ingrained in this working culture-
I no longer lecture, because well I am not perfect. I simply can not afford to buy all my food organic. But most of Ezra’s food has an organic sticker. I wish organic milk was a lot cheeper, because soy isn’t always the greatest option. (it’s a lot harder for your body to digest.)
I know I am not a perfect, especially environmentally. I use disposable diapers. We are renters and don’t own our own washer. But I try-
Sunday, August 26
sigh!
why cant people be truthful with themselves and with other people?
why do people further complicate their emotions?
Friday started to be a good day, and ended up in a big pile of shit. i hate arguing, and what i argue about seems so stupid when i play it back, especially to other people.
i am the queen of not always dealing with what is wrong at that moment of time, thus i pile my anger in a pot to boil on the stove.
but the pot got poured out and we actually had a date, on Saturday night- the problem about having a date, it means my mother in law took baby boy for the evening- oh she thinks i hate her, because she doesn't see him enough-
can i win? its not her, i do think she puts binders on, and is to complacent to the world. no its not her, or the care he receives in her company- its the shenanigans and the constant drama my sister in law creates for her self- see my sister in law lives in the upstairs apartment, you know and a lot of things that goes on is like watching and re-watching jerry springer over and over again. and if something happened where my mother in law would happen to get involved, and my baby was there, well i wouldnt be a very happy mama. i just dont think he needs to be exposed to the shit that goes on- i wont go into details because its family- but its enough to bother me-
i want to paint, with others, :( I am just lonely lately and want people to converse with-
why do people further complicate their emotions?
Friday started to be a good day, and ended up in a big pile of shit. i hate arguing, and what i argue about seems so stupid when i play it back, especially to other people.
i am the queen of not always dealing with what is wrong at that moment of time, thus i pile my anger in a pot to boil on the stove.
but the pot got poured out and we actually had a date, on Saturday night- the problem about having a date, it means my mother in law took baby boy for the evening- oh she thinks i hate her, because she doesn't see him enough-
can i win? its not her, i do think she puts binders on, and is to complacent to the world. no its not her, or the care he receives in her company- its the shenanigans and the constant drama my sister in law creates for her self- see my sister in law lives in the upstairs apartment, you know and a lot of things that goes on is like watching and re-watching jerry springer over and over again. and if something happened where my mother in law would happen to get involved, and my baby was there, well i wouldnt be a very happy mama. i just dont think he needs to be exposed to the shit that goes on- i wont go into details because its family- but its enough to bother me-
i want to paint, with others, :( I am just lonely lately and want people to converse with-
Thursday, August 23
quite night lots of thoughts-just daily life
Charles is at work, and I tend to get Ezra pie to sleep pretty easy when its just he and I. i think i am generally quieter. though when i want to get something done, like work on a painting, he wants to stay up. i think thats just how the world works.
I hate foreseeing things about people who are close to me. Like I foresee Charles burning at both ends in the near future. he has a lot on his plate right now, and doesn't know how to take a 'chill pill'. Hes back at school, and has to maintain a grade point average, to keep his smart grant, which pays for him to go to school. so thats a lot of pressure! hes also in calculus 2. which is like calculus 4 at the university he was attending before. so he feels like he is playing catch up, and freaking out. when i look at his book, I the college graduate go, uhh, scratch head, what is this? i am not a math person. I also read a part of his modern physics handout, and got it, thought it was interesting, till we got to multi variable equations, and went oh thats enough for me!
I dont know how to relive his stress, but to suggest that we put Ezra in daycare an extra day a week, so he could just do school work. but the problem is, that extra day is another cost- and well we almost didn't get our discount in the first place-sigh!
can we ever win financially? I don't want to be 'rich', just happy, comfortable. I am applying for a new job, more money sort of thing, the problem about making more money, is that it really wont make a difference. our discount for daycare will be cut, our co-pays will increase, i will look into buying our home...you know. i really do want our own home, but with a husband in school, the time isn't right- i also don't think i want to live in cincinnati much longer- the weather is driving me nuts! i need a change-
yeah a change from 102 degree temps- its been so hot, that the little boy has been sleeping in our bed room. the air in his room sucks, and he tends to awaken a lot if hes to hot, and a working mama needs her sleep!
I hate foreseeing things about people who are close to me. Like I foresee Charles burning at both ends in the near future. he has a lot on his plate right now, and doesn't know how to take a 'chill pill'. Hes back at school, and has to maintain a grade point average, to keep his smart grant, which pays for him to go to school. so thats a lot of pressure! hes also in calculus 2. which is like calculus 4 at the university he was attending before. so he feels like he is playing catch up, and freaking out. when i look at his book, I the college graduate go, uhh, scratch head, what is this? i am not a math person. I also read a part of his modern physics handout, and got it, thought it was interesting, till we got to multi variable equations, and went oh thats enough for me!
I dont know how to relive his stress, but to suggest that we put Ezra in daycare an extra day a week, so he could just do school work. but the problem is, that extra day is another cost- and well we almost didn't get our discount in the first place-sigh!
can we ever win financially? I don't want to be 'rich', just happy, comfortable. I am applying for a new job, more money sort of thing, the problem about making more money, is that it really wont make a difference. our discount for daycare will be cut, our co-pays will increase, i will look into buying our home...you know. i really do want our own home, but with a husband in school, the time isn't right- i also don't think i want to live in cincinnati much longer- the weather is driving me nuts! i need a change-
yeah a change from 102 degree temps- its been so hot, that the little boy has been sleeping in our bed room. the air in his room sucks, and he tends to awaken a lot if hes to hot, and a working mama needs her sleep!
things that deeply disturb me
http://foia.fbi.gov/guantanamo/122106.htm
so yeah. so i am deleting my cookies and other files and my computer freezes, this always happens when i try to read these sites-
so yeah. so i am deleting my cookies and other files and my computer freezes, this always happens when i try to read these sites-
Tuesday, August 21
Well I am trying to plan our family vacation to Chicago- I am actually trying to plan activities we all would enjoy. Such as visiting a children’s museum for Ezra, it advertised from birth to up, so I am guessing they have somewhere he can crawl around and discover things?
I have no idea what this trip will be like, I hope Ezra gets enough sleep in the car, to think the world around him is cool to look at. We get to go enough places where he can get to move around and explore. That we don’t spend to much damn money, and have fun.
Here are some problems I see us running into. Stopping way to many times on the way there or the way back. Charles is still a hard core smoker, and there is no smoking allowed in car with Ezra. Thus he wanting to stop for a smoke fix, to many times. Ezra being hungry the whole time and demanding to eat, or start screaming when we are stuck in traffic. He just being cranky the whole entire trip, hopefully he will learn its ok, to take a nap in the stroller.
Wish us luck-
oh ps, one day i will settle on a colors for this blog i promise
I have no idea what this trip will be like, I hope Ezra gets enough sleep in the car, to think the world around him is cool to look at. We get to go enough places where he can get to move around and explore. That we don’t spend to much damn money, and have fun.
Here are some problems I see us running into. Stopping way to many times on the way there or the way back. Charles is still a hard core smoker, and there is no smoking allowed in car with Ezra. Thus he wanting to stop for a smoke fix, to many times. Ezra being hungry the whole time and demanding to eat, or start screaming when we are stuck in traffic. He just being cranky the whole entire trip, hopefully he will learn its ok, to take a nap in the stroller.
Wish us luck-
oh ps, one day i will settle on a colors for this blog i promise
Monday, August 20
my song
My friend posted a tori song, that fit who she was at this moment. as time passes on this song always fits me best-
"Cornflake Girl"
Never was a cornflake girl
Thought that was a good solution
Hanging with the raisin girls
She's gone to the other side
Givin us a yo heave ho
Things are getting kind of gross
And I go at sleepy time
This is not really happening
You bet your life it is
Peel out the watchword
Just peel out the watchword
She knows what's goin on
Seems we got a cheaper feel now
All the sweetcaze are gone
Gone to the other side
With my encyclopedia
They musta paid her a nice price
She's putting on her string bean love
This is not really happening
You bet your life it is
Peal our the watchword
Just peel out the watchword
Never was a cornflake girl
Thought that was a good solution
Rabbit where'd you put the keys girl
And the man with the golden gun thinks he knows so much
Thinks he knows so much
Rabbit where'd you put the keys girl
"Cornflake Girl"
Never was a cornflake girl
Thought that was a good solution
Hanging with the raisin girls
She's gone to the other side
Givin us a yo heave ho
Things are getting kind of gross
And I go at sleepy time
This is not really happening
You bet your life it is
Peel out the watchword
Just peel out the watchword
She knows what's goin on
Seems we got a cheaper feel now
All the sweetcaze are gone
Gone to the other side
With my encyclopedia
They musta paid her a nice price
She's putting on her string bean love
This is not really happening
You bet your life it is
Peal our the watchword
Just peel out the watchword
Never was a cornflake girl
Thought that was a good solution
Rabbit where'd you put the keys girl
And the man with the golden gun thinks he knows so much
Thinks he knows so much
Rabbit where'd you put the keys girl
not much
its been a week-
yet another person i knew, not well, past away, and yet another funeral that i missed.
I didn't know the person well, but we had a laugh, a beer, a thought in time together-
it reminded me of how i missed a funeral of a friend that I did know better, and how angry i was that i didn't find out about his death till a bit of time passed by-I couldnt find his grave, when i went to visit it, to say my goodbye, and that still bugs me-
I have been asking the question of why some folks pass through my life, why some stay, and why they are important-
i dont have those answers, maybe i never will-
here are my thoughts to Travis, Bryon and Doug- you shall be miss, your lives were cut to short my friends-
yet another person i knew, not well, past away, and yet another funeral that i missed.
I didn't know the person well, but we had a laugh, a beer, a thought in time together-
it reminded me of how i missed a funeral of a friend that I did know better, and how angry i was that i didn't find out about his death till a bit of time passed by-I couldnt find his grave, when i went to visit it, to say my goodbye, and that still bugs me-
I have been asking the question of why some folks pass through my life, why some stay, and why they are important-
i dont have those answers, maybe i never will-
here are my thoughts to Travis, Bryon and Doug- you shall be miss, your lives were cut to short my friends-
Wednesday, August 15
free write
Free writing because it’s what I am in the mood to do
I feel like running. Easy, life? No it was never easy, it just used to be simpler, or at least I thought it was. I am trying to understand if everything is complicated, or I, overcomplicate it because I, am bored. I am not dramatic, not in the sense of baby mommy drama, or screaming on the street corner at your lover. But I am complicated.
No matter what my sentence will not be perfect. All my commas are out of place, the grammar team will have a mission. My syntax’s are mixed up. I am presenting myself as uneducated to the masses. Come punish me now.
It smells like sulfur, sulfur when released smells like shit. It causes cancer. My job is cancerous, just like the microwave and the cell phone.
I use those things now daily. They never proved they are link to cancer, but I know better. Now don’t I.
Singing songs, “they has commit me because they thought I was crazy”
What the fuck does crazy mean in the first place? And can I have a degree in it?
Oh I do have a degree, not that it helps much. I don’t apply my natural skills and abilities. I have to much time on my hands, but not enough time to do anything.
I am always picking up the pieces. Its like clothing left on the floor, that I didn’t place there.
The lonely girl with dyed hair sits at her desk. She is thinking thoughts that could be consider mystical in nature.
That’s me, switch to third person omission there didn’t I. You thought I didn’t pay attention in English class did you?
I feel like running. Easy, life? No it was never easy, it just used to be simpler, or at least I thought it was. I am trying to understand if everything is complicated, or I, overcomplicate it because I, am bored. I am not dramatic, not in the sense of baby mommy drama, or screaming on the street corner at your lover. But I am complicated.
No matter what my sentence will not be perfect. All my commas are out of place, the grammar team will have a mission. My syntax’s are mixed up. I am presenting myself as uneducated to the masses. Come punish me now.
It smells like sulfur, sulfur when released smells like shit. It causes cancer. My job is cancerous, just like the microwave and the cell phone.
I use those things now daily. They never proved they are link to cancer, but I know better. Now don’t I.
Singing songs, “they has commit me because they thought I was crazy”
What the fuck does crazy mean in the first place? And can I have a degree in it?
Oh I do have a degree, not that it helps much. I don’t apply my natural skills and abilities. I have to much time on my hands, but not enough time to do anything.
I am always picking up the pieces. Its like clothing left on the floor, that I didn’t place there.
The lonely girl with dyed hair sits at her desk. She is thinking thoughts that could be consider mystical in nature.
That’s me, switch to third person omission there didn’t I. You thought I didn’t pay attention in English class did you?
Tuesday, August 14
Friday, August 10
Here are some random facts that I found amusing/intresting for some reason or another. At the bottom you will find 13 random facts about me.
According to suicide statistics, Monday is the favored day for self-destruction.
The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
It is believed that Shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James Version of the Bible was written. In Psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is shake and the 46th word from the last word is spear.
The first known contraceptive was crocodile dung, used by Egyptians in 2000 B.C.
When you die your hair still grows for a couple of months.
1 in 5,000 north Atlantic lobsters are born bright blue.
Every year about 98% of the atoms in your body are replaced.
The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 feet (9 m).
Canadian researchers have found that Einstein's brain was 15% wider than normal
The largest number of children born to one woman is recorded at 69. From 1725-1765, a Russian peasant woman gave birth to 16 sets of twins, 7 sets of triplets, and 4 sets of quadruplets.
Cats can hear ultrasound
George W Bush, 750 laws broken and counting George W. Bush is the first u.s. president to declare himself exempt from over 750 U.S. laws, sidestepping most of the bill of rights including the constitutional requirement that the president follow all laws. Yes, they mentioned it specifically to suppress tyranny.
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than
left-handed people do.
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laserprinters all have in common? A. All invented by women.
Random 13 about me!
1: I love horseradish sauce, I can eat it with french-fries or a cheese sandwich.
2: From time to time, I might occasionally slurp vinaigrette.
3: I also like to eat raw onions.
4: I will never wear a bikini again.
5: I’ve been to base camp on MT. Everest.
6: I hate to shoe shop.
7: I hate driving when my husband is in the car.
8: I haven’t had red meat in 12 years.
9: I’ve prayed with Buddhist monks in a temple, in the highest city in the world.
10: I am allergic to many deodorants, thus sometimes I might smell.
11: I am not afraid of heights, but afraid of falling when I come down.
12: All the members of my family that live with me are born on the cusp of a astrological sign. 13: I know how to read tarot cards.
According to suicide statistics, Monday is the favored day for self-destruction.
The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
It is believed that Shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James Version of the Bible was written. In Psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is shake and the 46th word from the last word is spear.
The first known contraceptive was crocodile dung, used by Egyptians in 2000 B.C.
When you die your hair still grows for a couple of months.
1 in 5,000 north Atlantic lobsters are born bright blue.
Every year about 98% of the atoms in your body are replaced.
The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 feet (9 m).
Canadian researchers have found that Einstein's brain was 15% wider than normal
The largest number of children born to one woman is recorded at 69. From 1725-1765, a Russian peasant woman gave birth to 16 sets of twins, 7 sets of triplets, and 4 sets of quadruplets.
Cats can hear ultrasound
George W Bush, 750 laws broken and counting George W. Bush is the first u.s. president to declare himself exempt from over 750 U.S. laws, sidestepping most of the bill of rights including the constitutional requirement that the president follow all laws. Yes, they mentioned it specifically to suppress tyranny.
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than
left-handed people do.
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laserprinters all have in common? A. All invented by women.
Random 13 about me!
1: I love horseradish sauce, I can eat it with french-fries or a cheese sandwich.
2: From time to time, I might occasionally slurp vinaigrette.
3: I also like to eat raw onions.
4: I will never wear a bikini again.
5: I’ve been to base camp on MT. Everest.
6: I hate to shoe shop.
7: I hate driving when my husband is in the car.
8: I haven’t had red meat in 12 years.
9: I’ve prayed with Buddhist monks in a temple, in the highest city in the world.
10: I am allergic to many deodorants, thus sometimes I might smell.
11: I am not afraid of heights, but afraid of falling when I come down.
12: All the members of my family that live with me are born on the cusp of a astrological sign. 13: I know how to read tarot cards.
Wednesday, August 8
its been a while...
Since I have written anything. Sorry, my life has been really busy this week, to ha write it all down.
Its been about two weeks of sick baby mode. He had an ear infection, and then a weird allergic reaction to his medicine. this has been eating up my time.
hes getting better and crawling like a dickens, he loves to chase the cats, and crawl to things that arent his toys, i really think at this point that toys are useless...i mean he was amused by a lint rolling brush for about 1/2 hour today-
we also have gasp found daycare for him-
on other baby news hes been sleeping in our bed, since his air condtioner in his room sucks balls, and its been way to hot!
sigh i dont really want to write about me.
ill get back to myself later, right now i am in mom mode, and wish i had more cookies..
Its been about two weeks of sick baby mode. He had an ear infection, and then a weird allergic reaction to his medicine. this has been eating up my time.
hes getting better and crawling like a dickens, he loves to chase the cats, and crawl to things that arent his toys, i really think at this point that toys are useless...i mean he was amused by a lint rolling brush for about 1/2 hour today-
we also have gasp found daycare for him-
on other baby news hes been sleeping in our bed, since his air condtioner in his room sucks balls, and its been way to hot!
sigh i dont really want to write about me.
ill get back to myself later, right now i am in mom mode, and wish i had more cookies..
Friday, August 3
I hate feeling like a negative Nancy. But there are periods of time, where believe it or not I am not a bucket full of sunshine. Can you really put sunshine in a bucket?
As the days go on, I am considering seeing how much of a pain of ass it would be to go back to school to get my teaching license. I couldn’t do another four years, but I could do two. I would teach early elementary or government class. My only problem is that I am sure some of my students would have better grammar then I.
When I enter into political science, I thought my life would be much difference. It impossible to have a family and work on a campaign! Which is what I am trained to do, I miss, and a part of me wants to go back to. I don’t even care who I would work for that much…. (Granted on a moral front it would be better then what I do for a living now)
The problem is OHIO, is a forgotten state. I question about eight times a day, why I still live here.
(I know why)
But, even though were regimentally a very important state, because we have a significant electoral vote. No one cares the outcome of an OHIO primary.
Thus in the early days of a presidential campaign there are few visits to Ohio, but Idaho which has less votes in the electoral college but has an earlier primary has a lot of campaign jobs, right now.
The fundamental reason for primaries is that smaller states like New Hampshire would have a voice on who would become president. Thus they were bequeathed an earlier primary date.
Ok, enough with my two dollar words.
I think in the true sense of democracy that it would be fairer, but then I know by now democracy….
(a moment of self censoring going on)
Here’s an old classic song from my teenage years that sometimes just fits
I had visions, I was in them,I was looking into the mirror
To see a little bit clearer
The rottenness and evil in me
Fingertips have memories,
Mine can't forget the curves of your body
And when I feel a bit naughty
I run it up the flagpole and see who salutes
(But no one ever does)
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
and I'm so hot 'cause I'm in hell
Been around the world and found
That only stupid people are breeding
The cretins cloning and feeding
And I don't even own a TV
Put me in the hospital for nerves
And then they had to commit me
You told them all I was crazy
They cut off my legs now I'm an amputee, Goddamn you
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And it's a sin to live so well
I wanna publish 'zines
And rage against machines
I wanna pierce my tongue
It doesn't hurt, it feels fine
The trivial sublime
I'd like to turn off time
And kill my mind
You kill my mind
Mind...Paranoia, paranoia
Everybody's comin' to get me
Just say you never met me
I'm runnin' underground with the moles
Diggin' in holes
Hear the voices in my head
I swear to God it sounds like they're snoring
But if you're bored then you're boringT
he agony and the irony, they're killing me, whoa!
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And it's a sin to live this well
(One, two, three, fouR!)
Aww to be a early teenager again. If you know who sings that song, well then I give ya props…
As the days go on, I am considering seeing how much of a pain of ass it would be to go back to school to get my teaching license. I couldn’t do another four years, but I could do two. I would teach early elementary or government class. My only problem is that I am sure some of my students would have better grammar then I.
When I enter into political science, I thought my life would be much difference. It impossible to have a family and work on a campaign! Which is what I am trained to do, I miss, and a part of me wants to go back to. I don’t even care who I would work for that much…. (Granted on a moral front it would be better then what I do for a living now)
The problem is OHIO, is a forgotten state. I question about eight times a day, why I still live here.
(I know why)
But, even though were regimentally a very important state, because we have a significant electoral vote. No one cares the outcome of an OHIO primary.
Thus in the early days of a presidential campaign there are few visits to Ohio, but Idaho which has less votes in the electoral college but has an earlier primary has a lot of campaign jobs, right now.
The fundamental reason for primaries is that smaller states like New Hampshire would have a voice on who would become president. Thus they were bequeathed an earlier primary date.
Ok, enough with my two dollar words.
I think in the true sense of democracy that it would be fairer, but then I know by now democracy….
(a moment of self censoring going on)
Here’s an old classic song from my teenage years that sometimes just fits
I had visions, I was in them,I was looking into the mirror
To see a little bit clearer
The rottenness and evil in me
Fingertips have memories,
Mine can't forget the curves of your body
And when I feel a bit naughty
I run it up the flagpole and see who salutes
(But no one ever does)
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
and I'm so hot 'cause I'm in hell
Been around the world and found
That only stupid people are breeding
The cretins cloning and feeding
And I don't even own a TV
Put me in the hospital for nerves
And then they had to commit me
You told them all I was crazy
They cut off my legs now I'm an amputee, Goddamn you
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And it's a sin to live so well
I wanna publish 'zines
And rage against machines
I wanna pierce my tongue
It doesn't hurt, it feels fine
The trivial sublime
I'd like to turn off time
And kill my mind
You kill my mind
Mind...Paranoia, paranoia
Everybody's comin' to get me
Just say you never met me
I'm runnin' underground with the moles
Diggin' in holes
Hear the voices in my head
I swear to God it sounds like they're snoring
But if you're bored then you're boringT
he agony and the irony, they're killing me, whoa!
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And I'm so hot cause I'm in hell
I'm not sick, but I'm not well
And it's a sin to live this well
(One, two, three, fouR!)
Aww to be a early teenager again. If you know who sings that song, well then I give ya props…
Wednesday, August 1
Am I?
Last night I couldn’t fall asleep. My mind was buzzing with electricity. I hated each and every pillow that we have on our bed. Every way I turned I couldn’t relax.
Thoughts raced like dancing fireflies.
I wondered am I a good person, would I hang out with myself, if I was out of my body?
There are moments when I don’t like the thoughts that pulse through my head. They are usually about a person. Sometimes I will mutter what I am thinking, and pray that no one will hear me. I understand where these thoughts steam from, usually from my issues with jealousy, or this judgmental side of me.
I am jealous, of petty things. It’s the grass is greener on the other side bit. In reality I am pretty happy, but there’s this little part of me that wants something more.
There’s another me the one who self sensors. I know I am doing it. I don’t like to hurt people, even though it might be in the long run for their betterment. I self sensor because I don’t know if I am judging them; or I am actually correct on my observations on their behavior? I am soft spoken. I can be combative, usually and only when I am comfortable enough with the people to be. I really don’t always….
I guess right now I feel like I am changing-
I guess right now I feel like hiding in a hole-
I guess right now I am considering going to therapy-
I am wondering if this is all generated from my lack of sleep
Thoughts raced like dancing fireflies.
I wondered am I a good person, would I hang out with myself, if I was out of my body?
There are moments when I don’t like the thoughts that pulse through my head. They are usually about a person. Sometimes I will mutter what I am thinking, and pray that no one will hear me. I understand where these thoughts steam from, usually from my issues with jealousy, or this judgmental side of me.
I am jealous, of petty things. It’s the grass is greener on the other side bit. In reality I am pretty happy, but there’s this little part of me that wants something more.
There’s another me the one who self sensors. I know I am doing it. I don’t like to hurt people, even though it might be in the long run for their betterment. I self sensor because I don’t know if I am judging them; or I am actually correct on my observations on their behavior? I am soft spoken. I can be combative, usually and only when I am comfortable enough with the people to be. I really don’t always….
I guess right now I feel like I am changing-
I guess right now I feel like hiding in a hole-
I guess right now I am considering going to therapy-
I am wondering if this is all generated from my lack of sleep
Am I?
Last night I couldn’t fall asleep. My mind was buzzing with electricity. I hated each and every pillow that we have on our bed. Every way I turned I couldn’t relax.
Thoughts raced like dancing fireflies.
I wondered am I a good person, would I hang out with myself, if I was out of my body?
There are moments when I don’t like the thoughts that pulse through my head. They are usually about a person. Sometimes I will mutter what I am thinking, and pray that no one will hear me. I understand where these thoughts steam from, usually from my issues with jealousy, or this judgmental side of me.
I am jealous, of petty things. It’s the grass is greener on the other side bit. In reality I am pretty happy, but there’s this little part of me that wants something more.
There’s another me the one who self sensors. I know I am doing it. I don’t like to hurt people, even though it might be in the long run for their betterment. I self sensor because I don’t know if I am judging them; or I am actually correct on my observations on their behavior? I am soft spoken. I can be combative, usually and only when I am comfortable enough with the people to be. I really don’t always….
I guess right now I feel like I am changing-
I guess right now I feel like hiding in a hole-
I guess right now I am considering going to therapy-
I am wondering if this is all generated from my lack of sleep
Thoughts raced like dancing fireflies.
I wondered am I a good person, would I hang out with myself, if I was out of my body?
There are moments when I don’t like the thoughts that pulse through my head. They are usually about a person. Sometimes I will mutter what I am thinking, and pray that no one will hear me. I understand where these thoughts steam from, usually from my issues with jealousy, or this judgmental side of me.
I am jealous, of petty things. It’s the grass is greener on the other side bit. In reality I am pretty happy, but there’s this little part of me that wants something more.
There’s another me the one who self sensors. I know I am doing it. I don’t like to hurt people, even though it might be in the long run for their betterment. I self sensor because I don’t know if I am judging them; or I am actually correct on my observations on their behavior? I am soft spoken. I can be combative, usually and only when I am comfortable enough with the people to be. I really don’t always….
I guess right now I feel like I am changing-
I guess right now I feel like hiding in a hole-
I guess right now I am considering going to therapy-
I am wondering if this is all generated from my lack of sleep
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