cassady

Yester year

tangled in the cob webs of yester year
I walked on cobblestones beside canal beds
holding your hand, sweet cassady

you roamed like a buffalo
free and wild
never to be tamed by the kiss of my hand

now you are a mold of memories
a box full of letters
lying inside the northen skies
empty and barely known

familiar notes, and blue jean jackets
brought my youth back to me, sweet cassady
I was once a dandelion unfolding into a jagged rose

now i am torned
aged,
but not withered to the storm
i will look onto winter skies
and smile
sweet cassady

morning poem

Oranges run like water
Tart, and sticky
Creamy red hues, sprinkle yellow
Taste
Cut peel
Thick oblong layers

Various, Random

At the moment I am busily copying cds for my dad for his christmas present.
Sadly some of the songs that I download that he wanted were corrupted, so I had to dig into my own music collection-
I have a random file, things that match a mood during a certain day-
From Marylin Manson, to Ray Charles, I have to say that my musical tastes are pretty strange-
At the moment I am listening to 'black velvet- yes the original version.

But to dig into my past, I did a painting in high school based on lyrics of this song. It's a reflection of who I thought I was, or what I thought my life embodied, maybe parts of it still does, maybe it was all just teenage angst getting my brain?



"I Don't Like The Drugs (But The Drugs Like Me)"

Norm life baby "we're white and oh so hetero and our sex is missionary."
Norm life baby "we're quitters and we're sober our confessions will be televised."

You and I are underdosed and we're ready to fall
Raised to be stupid, taught to be nothing at all

I don't like the drugs but the drugs like me
I don't like the drugs, the drugs, the drugs

Norm life baby "our god is white and unforgiving we're piss tested and we're praying."
Norm life baby "I'm just a sample of a soul made to look just like a human being."

Norm life baby "we're rehabbed and we're ready for our 15 minutes of shame."
Norm life baby "we're talkshown and we're poiting just like christians at a suicide."

You and I are underdosed and we're ready to fall
Raised to be stupid, taught to be nothing at all
I don't like the drugs but the drugs like me
I don't like the drugs, the drugs, the drugs


After hearing the songs, it sadly reminds me of a friend of mine who passed away-

it just doesn't stop being funny

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFX-dKpcDz8

lot on my plate

I have a lot on my plate this evening when I finally get out of school-
cds to burn, yikes!
Paintings to make- perhaphs!

Help me the holiday time sucks!

things..

Things are going, I thought I update- feel like my mind has been driifting in one thousand places at once-
I always feel as I have a thousand things to do on my list, and try to tackle them all, but the results are not as perfect as I want to-
I am trying hard to enjoy math, I always ask why in my brain about rules, with out good enough explanations-
such as if you are squaring a polynomial, why in world do you follow the rules that you do-

I have school up to the day before christmas eve. Not allowing me to really prepare for christmas at all.

Things I Want for Christmas

Material: Hair cut
Non-Material:

For Obama not to be a figure head to the machine.
For American socialism to turn it's head and go the other way and start with health-care, education-

and the list goes on.

corn

We now have corn growing in our kitchen-

A: I was getting out something from the top shelf where our popcorn kernels were.
B: Someone did not shut the bag correctly
C: They spilled all over my head and onto the floor
D: Little one took kernels and placed them in my palm tree plant,
E: Earlier in the day's the cat's were eating palm and digging at plants roots, so soil was all airified, and digged up
F: Some amount of time, baby corn appeared.
F 2: Moved pot to better light spot.
G: wondering if the cats will now eat the corn plants as cat grass?

doop

Just some pictures to show my various parts of my personality.

It's been pretty quiet in my head. Things are going...found out quite recently that I can't take out a private loan for going to school with out a co-signer. Quite frankly the website said unless you have perfect credit, it's a no go. Sigh! Also on another website said we are no longer giving student loans, because of the economic climate of America. Umm what the f-ck was that 700 billion dollars for? It wasn't for me.
So I feel screwed. I could not go to school, re-enter the work force, and Oh not find a job!
Personally I have to lie now on applications about my qualifications, or I am doomed to be to over-qualified.
I know we will get through the madness, I am flying by in my classes, and will be hitting my five terms of co-op (which equates to a year), soon. I know how to kiss ass in the right ways, make my connections to the hospital or doctors office, and be in the medical field. Which is the only field that is not regressing. Only if I could of made this choice, when I was 18. But then I thought my thoughts, actions, and opinions would support me. What the hell did I know?
Nothing! My thoughts, actions and opinions are only segments of me, and can't be counted on to support me, unless I want to sell my soul to a candidate. Was once a possibility, but not with a bouncing two year old boy.
I could, but it's not me, put him in day care for 9# hours a day. But that didn't work so much. If someone going to screw with his brain, it should at least be his parents. That means I don't support women who go to work, and use day-care, those are options in which they decided, and if that works for them, bless them. Ezra does go to day care for about 12-14 hours a week when I am at school. He enjoys it, and loves playing with other kids. I just couldn't deal with the five days a week. The outcome of this decision means scrapping by- It sucks, I have debt that scares me, but life will even out. If it doesn't- well money I have learned does not buy happiness, its a tool that you use.

Let's see- Boring crap-

were still working on Pooping on the Potty. He is totally trained in the peeing department. Goes to the bathroom by himself, but Poop on the other hand is a whole another ball game.

Trains, trains, trains.

Common words spoken : (by two year old)

Why?
want to play-
Can I see?
Hi!
Eh da wa Cndy or I want Candy
Mine, Yeah, and NO

Common words spoken by 27 year old?

Go pee then-
No
Get down!
That is pretty cool-
Is Bush out of office yet?
This is a; That ______ is this ___________
No, we been through this there is no Candy left-
Veggies are better!
Thank-you
lets go play trains now!